And Then...

GOD! He showed up... Pink Impact was amazing! AMAZING!

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For the last few weeks, God has been revealing Himself to me as my Daddy, and me as His little girl. Oh my Daddy does love me. He does.

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Okay, so the first thing that I want to do is outline the amazing messages that were delivered Friday and Saturday:

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On Friday morning, Marilyn Hickey stepped on the platform and she shared the story of Ruth. Oh My Goodness! What an anointed word. She said that when faced with choices in life we can do one of two things:

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1. The Expected - the ordinary, the average... What the crowd would do. And then we get expected results. Even consequences.

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OR

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2. THE EXCEPTIONAL - A choice of faith, a choice that may involve risk and may cause people to question our judgment. But, this kind of decision requires us to believe God even when we don't know what He is up to... To move in His direction even when it means we don't know where we are going and to do what He requires even when it is hard, it hurts and it doesn't make any sense at all. The result of making exceptional decisions as Dr. Hickey shared is that GOD does EXTRAORDINARY things with our EXCEPTIONAL decisions. Oh Yes. Now that is where I want to live. Favor, Blessing, and Grace... I want to experience the exceptional response of God in my life and my circumstances. We must be EXCEPTIONAL PEOPLE because we serve an EXTRAORDINARY GOD.

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A few QUOTES from this session:

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* "One Word from the Lord can change your life forever."

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* "God thinks you can do anything."

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* "Ruth is the 8th book of the Bible. Eight is the number of new beginnings."

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* "Stay in faith." (God can work miracles out of our biggest mistakes.)

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* "God loves stupid people." (Okay, this may have been my favorite quote)

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* "Expected is what the world does. Exceptional is what faith does."

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* "Walking in faith brings favor. Walking in faith is something you do even when you don't feel it."

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* "How to get a husband: Ruth 3:3. Take a bath, get a new dress, anoint yourself (aka "put on some perfume"), and then go lay at his feet and pull his robe over you."

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* "You can't do the expected and expect God to do the EXTRAORDINARY."

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* "REPENT and CLEAN UP."

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* "Don't let the world tell you what you can't do let God tell you what you will do."

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OKAY... Did you get all that? Read the book of Ruth and look for how Naomi and Elimelech as well as their sons made expected decisions and what resulted. Then note how Naomi, Ruth, and Boaz made EXCEPTIONAL decisions and what happened that was extraordinary. You can also consider how Ruth and Boaz had Obed, who fathered Jesse who fathered David and from David the line of Jesus was brought forth. Boaz was also the son of RAHAB. Okay... Read Matthew 1:1 and consider that Boaz was the "Kinsman Redeemer." When he took Ruth as his wife, he had to buy the property that would have belonged to her husband and give the child he had with her the name of her deceased husband. But, in Matthew 1:1 we learn that God had other plans for Boaz. Oh Yes He did. God did the Extraordinary because Boaz chose to do the exceptional.

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IN the afternoon on Friday, Dr. Hickey shared about Abigail, Nabal and David (1 Samuel 26). She started out by reminding us that every person is in a season. She stated, "God has a purpose and power in this season for me." 1 Corinthians 4:20.

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Dr. Hickey pointed out that Nabal was just "big mouth ugly." But, his wife, Abigail, was a sensitive, honorable wife who covered for her husband.

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She recounted the way David sent word to Nabal requesting to be invited to the feast Nabal was throwing. Nabal's refusal incensed David and our "heart like His" hero vows to kill Nabal's entire household in retaliation. But, word reaches dear Abigail that David is planning to put an end to Nabal and his household. She prepares a huge feast and she takes it to David acknowledging that her husband's decision was inconsiderate and to make amends on behalf of Nabal.

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When Abigail returns home, Nabal is pretty well passed out drunk. She doesn't tell him what she has done until the next morning. Nabal's rage is so great he dies. WHAT?

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He pretty much gave himself a coronary. Abigail's decision was honorable, her husband's response was not. His continual abhorent behavior cost him his life. But, for Abigail, she gained favor in David's sight and was taken back as David's wife. Dr. Hickey noted that Abigail was beautiful to David. Her tender heart toward her overbearing husband and her obedient behavior toward God shown brightly to David and won his favor and his heart.

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A few of my favorite quotes from this message:

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* "There's no reason to look or act like a slop bucket at any age."

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* "The man (Nabal) with his decisions brought himself to the attention of the Lord for a short life span."

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* "God rewards us when we act in obedience in the season."

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* "We don't know the kind of harvest we will reap if we sow in obedience in this season."

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* "PURPOSE, POWER, REWARDS."

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* "The game is not over 'til you win."

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AND THEN... Dr. Hickey asked the A/V team to run a video and the power went out! No kidding - the whole building went dark.

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Our Women's Pastor, Debbie Morris, then took the stage and called us to pray, and Dr. Hickey asked us to hold hands. We did so. The words began to go up as we all prayed our hearts out. And then... someone across the room lifted their voice, "You are holy, holy are you Lord God almighty. Worthy is the Lamb, Worthy is the Lamb..."

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We sang that chorus for about ten minutes. When we began singing the chorus the second time the video and lighting equipment began to hum and the power lights began to flicker on. One of the spots had the word "HOT" written in the power reading window. The monitor facing the stage had a small blip dancing across the screen and little green and yellow lights were simply glowing all around the ceiling of the sanctuary.

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We closed out the session with presbytery and then recessed until evening. As I drove home I began to weigh something God had impressed upon my heart as we prayed, interceding for the conference in the last month. He showed me the Aurora Bourealis lights and this pressed me to study the cause of these lights.

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What I learned was that the magnetic quality of the North and South poles draw electronically charged particles up toward them and as the particles rise into the upper atmosphere they create the beautiful array of lights that are known as the Aurora Bourealis or the Northern Lights. These lights dance across the night sky in the northern most regions of Canada, Alaska and other parts of our world. As I was reading I also learned that scientist had known the source of the light but never quite knew what it was that caused these lights to dance in the sky. But, recently scientist have discovered a "magnetic tail" that whips out from the poles into the outer atmosphere of earth which causes the lights to dance in the sky.

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As I am reading this I hear, "Sit in the back and watch the atmosphere change and the Light(s) dance." I really felt God was going to do something very specific and it would bring a radical change to the atmosphere of the conference and involve light somehow.

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I am in awe as I return home and ready myself for the evening events. Of course, we were still praying for the power to come back up fully, but in all I had no anxiety or regret that things changed so dramatically. God was up to something, and I, for one, could not wait to see how it worked out.

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My youngest daughter and I returned that evening for the Friday night session. I met up with my fellow intercessors and received the instructions for the evening. We could all feel the "powering up" in the room. I even said at one point that I believed God had to shut the power off to the building so He could turn up the Holy Spirit power for the conference.

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There was only enough power to the building to light and power the sanctuary and they had the coffee bar up and running. But, the rest of the building was lit by candlelight - did you get that... CANDLELIGHT. We entered the sanctuary and got our seats. Then worship began.

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Kari Jobe took the stage and introduced "PINK Unplugged." An acoustic style session of worship where she and one other worship leader sang while the drummer played the hand drums. Half way through this incredible time of worship, I sensed the presence of God so strongly I began to tremble and my legs felt weak. I knelt down trembling on my hands and knees on the floor. I could only weep and sing before the Lord in awe of His presence.

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Suddenly, as I was singing a verse of Scripture God had given me to pray the day before came to my mind. Daniel 9:19. "O Lord hear! O Lord forgive! O Lord, listen and act! Do not delay for Your own sake my God, for Your city and Your people are called by Your name." (NKJV) [I officially did not know the address. I had heard a pastor speaking about this verse from Daniel 9 and it resonated as something I needed to be praying for PINK.]

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I opened my Bible to Daniel 9, but I began to read in Chapter 10. I could not find the exact phrase I had heard on the radio that day, but I landed on verses 10-13 and heard God speak these verses to me: "Suddenly a hand touched me, which made me tremble on my knees and on the palms of my hands. And he said to me, 'O [Michelle, woman] greatly beloved understand the words that I speak to you, and stand upright, for I have now been sent to you.' While he was speaking to me, I stood trembling. [AND] Then he said to me, 'Do not be afraid, [Michelle], for from the first day you set your heart to understand, and to humble yourself before your God, your words were heard and I have come in response to your words.'"

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So I stood up trembling in the revelation and presence of God. He was there - His presence thick and palpable. His love so sweet among us as our voices were lifted up to heaven. He was among us and we were basking in His glory.

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After worship, Pastor Robert Morris, our beloved pastor at Gateway, took the platform and delivered a message on John 9. He covered the entire chapter highlighting the ways that our response to God's activity in our lives can prevent us from having an "And Then..." moment.

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Here are Seven "Blockages" to "And Then" moments:

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1. Blame (John 9:1-5) The disciples' question Jesus about the cause of a man born blind. Because they were more focused on the "how" to the man being born blind rather than the "who" the man born blind was... They missed a great opportunity to have an "And Then..." Moment. They wanted to know who was wrong, not how God was going to take care of the man who was afflicted. BEST QUOTE: If you always need to assign blame to something or someone, you have an issue with pride. (Even if you are always blaming yourself.) If you are always looking to assign blame you will miss your "And then" moments with God.

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2. Disobedience (John 9:6) What if the man who was blind had not received Jesus' instructions when he placed the mud on his eyes? QUOTE QUESTION: What's the last thing God told you to do? Have you done it?

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3. Religion (John 9:13) Jesus healed on the Sabbath. The Pharisees were more concerned with the keeping of a religious law than the physical condition of the man who had been healed. One of the things I got here was this: "My ideas and traditions that I use to define any spiritual activity that engages God in relationship is religion." QUOTE: Religion refuses to see. (John 9:15)

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4. Unbelief (John 9:18) Unbelief always demands evidence. He stated that sometimes our need to know... to dot every "i" and cross every "t" and receive explanation and understanding will keep us from accepting the miracles God brings into our lives. He quoted Acts 26:8 "Why should it be though by you that it is incredible God raises the dead?" QUOTE; Why can't I accept a miracle?

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5. Fear (John 9:22) Fear wills top you from having your "And Then" moment. Fear is an expression that lacks faith. We are commended to step out when God speaks to us. QUOTE: Our great testimonies are often born out of our greatest tests.

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6. A Hard Heart (John 9:28) When we question God's miracles --- calling what God does evil, we are really refusing to believe and receive from God. He quoted "Hope Deferred Makes the Heart Sick." The Pharisees were so hardened by their own opinions and traditions that they couldn't see God when He was standing right in front of them. QUOTE: A hard heart can happen slowly or over time a little niggling away at your faith through testing and trials, or it can come suddenly through tragedy. (In tragedy if we find ourselves blaming God, we are walking into a trap of the enemy. "Satan always questions and blames God.")

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7. Pride (John 9:35) Jesus was telling the Pharisees here - if you would just recognize and admit that you need me, I'd remove your sin. But, since you do what you do without need of me, your sin remains on you. They had unteachable hearts. (John 9:38 was the And Then moment.)

ANYTHING CAN BE USED BY GOD TO PRODUCE AN "AND THEN" MOMENT! Look for them.

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Oh, and when we walked out into the hall after the service... The Atmosphere had totally changed. There were candles lighting the way to the fellowship area where desserts were being served and friends were gathering together. The mood had gone from festive to intimate in a matter of 24 hours. Before the conference began God told me to watch for a "Light Show" and for "the Atmosphere" to change. WOW!

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Are you worn out? I am... I will share the final part of this story a little later. Be Blessed sweet friends... Be Blessed!

Cut to the Heart

POST SCRIPT: The panic attack over my parents coming to the service, completely unfounded. And God so worked. They fully participated in the service and prayed to receive the Baptism during the service. A powerful and humbling lesson for me....

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At church our pastor, Robert Morris, has been doing a series called, "My Best Friend." The messages are about the Holy Spirit. These messages are similar to a series I've have heard him teach called "The Holy Spirit Revealed," but there is something that is "quickening" all around us as he teaches this particular series.

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I do not want to start or pursue a theological debate on the subject, but I have come to an understanding of the Baptism into the Holy Spirit and believe by faith I have received the fullness of that promise. Yesterday, Pastor Robert said, "Now let me tell you, the Holy Spirit is not weird... We should never be afraid of a gift God wants to give us."

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The message yesterday was indeed on the Baptism into the Holy Spirit. I had a bit of a panic attack on Friday when I got an email reminder for the Altar Ministry of the church protocol for the prayer of Salvation and praying for the Baptism into the Holy Spirit. My parents were planning to attend this weekend's service. I am not even kidding when I tell you I thought I might hyperventilate. I even considered calling and discouraging them from coming to church because - quite frankly - there are just some things I do not discuss with my father anymore for the simple fact he believes it is an emotional bunch of "HOOEY!"

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I told my husband, "I got an email today and my mother and father will attend a church service on The Baptism in the Holy Spirit." My eldest daugther was assumably sleeping nearby but giggled under her blanket. I said, "Why are you laughing?"

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She said, "You know why, it's Grandpa."

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Okay. So now you may be getting the gist of this thing. I was on pins and needles as we walked into church. The music and demonstrative worship at our church is conservative charismatic - we are encouraged to freely express our worship so long as we do so in an orderly fashion. We are free to clap, dance, sing, kneel, lay prostrate and so fort as long as it does not become a distraction or an attention getting ordeal. This troubles my father, but he enjoys Pastor Robert's messages and chooses to overlook what he calls "an overly emotional experience" in worship.

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Part of the message yesterday was a passage in Acts 2:36-38 (NKJV) "36 'Therefore let all the house of Israel know assuredly that God has made this Jesus, whom you crucified, both Lord and Christ.' 37 Now when they heard this, they were cut to the heart, and said to Peter and the rest of the apostles, 'Men and brethren, what shall we do?' 38 Then Peter said to them, 'Repent, and let every one of you be baptized in the name of Jesus Christ for the remission of sins; and you shall receive the gift of the Holy Spirit.'" (Emphasis added)

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Cut to the Heart. In this passage of Scripture, Peter is preaching to the Jews in Jerusalem. Those who very readily agreed to the crucifixion of Christ and the release of Barabas in His place. Can you imagine what the quickening of these words did to their hearts as Peter, the one who often had his foot in his mouth, spoke them to bring restoration and Salvation to their souls.

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When we think of being cut to the heart, what do we think of? A moment of deep emotional anguish? Turmoil, and deep conviction? What does that look like?

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CUT To The HEART. Not our physical heart that beats blood and life into our veins each and every second of our life, but our spiritual heart. The part of our soul where our passions, our mind and our will reside. The seat of our emotions, passions, desires, our free will and our intellect - the ability to learn and grow in knowledge as well as discernment - that is our spiritual heart! Their spiritual hearts were cut with Peter's words.

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Think of this: Have you ever been cut to the heart?

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I have - and recently - when I could have been obliged to take up an offense and wear it like a medal of honor around my neck. Instead, my heart broke over the situation and all I could do was see how I had played a part in the offense. I fell on my knees and wept in apology and brokenness. I begged for forgiveness and offered it as well. I was cut to the heart.

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Before we came to Gateway, I was in a small Baptist congregation and had been introduced to the concept of Baptism in the Holy Spirit by a few who were close to me. I didn't understand it. I was indeed quite intimidated by it, and to top it off I had been raised to believe it was not Biblical. So when someone placed a cd in my hand on the subject, I hastened to my car and popped it into the cd player on the dash. I listened. The intensity of the moment grew as I realized that what this pastor was saying was not only widely and evidently Biblical, but it was evident throughout the Bible and something Jesus not only encouraged but gave as an instruction to the Apostles/Disciples before leaving this earth. He instructed them to wait for the Holy Spirit to come upon them and empower them for the ministry. I was cut to the heart by my own ignorance and pious attitude about whether or not such a thing could be of God.

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That message that cut me to the heart was delivered by none other than Pastor Robert Morris. It was a Gateway Series message on "The Wealth of a Word."

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Years before I would come to this place seeking healing and freedom I would hear a message my heart had been crying out to God for over and over again. A message of power and love and how to experience more with God through His Holy Spirit.

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I began to pursue the baptism with great determination. I wanted it desperately. I talked with those I knew who had experienced it, and I prayed earnestly but nothing really changed.

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We came to Gateway in the Summer of 2007. It was an exciting new journey for me, and one of deep sorrow as I left finally the only place I had left that remembered Justin as I did - as one of the flock of that small Baptist church. A church lost its son the day my Justin died. I never once missed that reality as I made my way through those awful days of despair. I knew that healing was on the horizon, but I also knew there was much to do.

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The first class I attended was "The Baptism in the Holy Spirit." I could barely stand it as I waited to hear how to attain this incredible promise. But, something much more wonderful happened in its place. I realized in the two weeks of the class that I had already experienced those deeply personal moments when the Holy Spirit came upon me - only I did not call them "The Baptism of the Holy Spirit." I just said, "God showed up."

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The day I count as my Baptism is May 3, 2003. I learned all about power and love in one fell swoop and cried tears of great joy and awareness for 36 hours straight. All I could say in explanation: "It is like the scales have fallen off and I can just see God everywhere."

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I have sought and hoped for a fresh anointing and recognized when I was stepping out of His will and into my own numerous times since the revelation of this truth settled fully upon me.

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I now know what I could not have certainly told you two years ago, Jesus will Baptize us in the Holy Spirit and it brings power, truth and love in an limitless way.

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Conviction has come upon me time and again, each time God has cut me to the heart and required me to lay down some soulish way of mine so He could exchange it for a heavenly truth of His own. In February, 2005, I began to search out this truth of cutting the heart - and God

took me to the writings of Paul.

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Colossians 2:6-23 (New King James Version)

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"6 As you therefore have received Christ Jesus the Lord, so walk in Him, 7 rooted and built up in Him and established in the faith, as you have been taught, abounding in it with thanksgiving. 8 Beware lest anyone cheat you through philosophy and empty deceit, according to the tradition of men, according to the basic principles of the world, and not according to Christ. 9 For in Him dwells all the fullness of the Godhead bodily; 10 and you are complete in Him, who is the head of all principality and power.

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"11 In Him you were also circumcised with the circumcision made without hands, by putting off the body of the sins of the flesh, by the circumcision of Christ, 12 buried with Him in baptism, in which you also were raised with Him through faith in the working of God, who raised Him from the dead. 13 And you, being dead in your trespasses and the uncircumcision of your flesh, He has made alive together with Him, having forgiven you all trespasses, 14 having wiped out the handwriting of requirements that was against us, which was contrary to us. And He has taken it out of the way, having nailed it to the cross. 15 Having disarmed principalities and powers, He made a public spectacle of them, triumphing over them in it. 16 So let no one judge you in food or in drink, or regarding a festival or a new moon or sabbaths, 17 which are a shadow of things to come, but the substance is of Christ. 18 Let no one cheat you of your reward, taking delight in false humility and worship of angels, intruding into those things which he has not seen, vainly puffed up by his fleshly mind, 19 and not holding fast to the Head, from whom all the body, nourished and knit together by joints and ligaments, grows with the increase that is from God. 20 Therefore, if you died with Christ from the basic principles of the world, why, as though living in the world, do you subject yourselves to regulations— 21 “Do not touch, do not taste, do not handle,” 22 which all concern things which perish with the using—according to the commandments and doctrines of men? 23 These things indeed have an appearance of wisdom in self-imposed religion, false humility, and neglect of the body, but are of no value against the indulgence of the flesh."

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After reading this passage over and over again, I cried out to God. "Circumcise me, Lord, cut everything away until only You remain."
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I later went to the pastor of that small Baptist church and asked him to water baptize me and I read this verse. I expressed to him a deep desire to publicly demonstrate the spiritual circumcision that God had been teaching me about and working in my life. He agreed. I was water baptized in obedience to my Lord and as a symbol of leaving that old life behind on February 6, 2005.
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A circumcision of flesh - is it not only the rite of a Jewish son to be physically circumcised but also the duty of a Jewish son to be circumcised. A duty performed by the father and priest of the child. It is during circumcision that a son's identity is made known and his name is given. It is during circumcision that the flesh is cut away and the instrument of a physical legacy is revealed. Think of this. What does it mean to be cut to the heart? For us our spiritual legacy begins and ends with our heart.
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God's Word calls us Sons, Co-heirs with Christ. Would it not, then, be appropriate to seek a circumcision of our flesh as the passage in Colossians points out. But, we cannot be circumcised if we are holding onto our soulish desires and attitudes. We must allow God to cut away anything of our "flesh" that remains in us so that we may be completely and purposefully His.
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This morning after my husband and I prayed, I explained this very thing to him and what it meant to me. Then I said these words, "Just before Christmas I told my father that the only thing that matters to me in this life is God being glorified and nothing else. And Baby, those aren't just words. That's my heart."
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That's my heart. Be blessed and know the Lord wants to do a new work in you this very minute - will you allow Him to cut you to the heart.