Prayer Log: Redding or Bust!

Hello Prayer Warriors! 

I'm coming online with a prayer request of my own. My prayer request is all about the new season of my life I am entering into. Woudl you please agree withme in prayer that I would be able to pay for a trip to Redding, California and Bethel Church within th next year. I want to pay for my husband or a friend to go with me to Redding to experience the supernaturally creative atmosphere that has been cultivated there. 

I have partaken of their ministries including their Supernatural School of Creativity Seminar from 2011, and have been so inspired and blessed. Still, I also know there is an impartation that takes place within the atmosphere one experience when you attend in person verses when you partake by video. 

Pray for Provision, God's Timing and His perfect will to be accomplished in every way! 

Blessings, M

Think PINK!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KX6TaA6IRkk

With Pink Impact | A Christian Women's Conference upon us, I thought I would lament on All Things PINK!

As Gateway Women, we are PINK! Pink at Gateway Church is not a color. IT is a realm of influence for women to step into. Think about the following words that Pastor Debbie and her team have brought to us to describe the Pink woman:

First of all the WORD "PINK" can be defined: the very embodiment (to give a body to (a spirit) : highest degree possible : height — in the pink : in the best of health or condition

Pink Women are also...

PASSIONATE. capable of, affected by, or expressing intense feeling; enthusiastic, ardent

POSITIONED.   an act of placing or arranging:  an arranging in order; place, situation, or standing: a situation that confers advantage or preference

PURPOSEFUL. meaningful, intentional; full of determination

POWERFUL. having great ability to act or produce an effect, prestige, or influence

POISED. having been put into readiness;  to have already been drawn up into readiness 

(Definitions taken from Merriam-Webster Online)

To be PINK is a call to a higher position or level of influence in your life as a woman whether it is in the marketplace, your church, the PTA at your child's school or in your very own neighborhood. To be PINK is to be shaped, fashioned and positioned by God's excellent nature for the powerful purpose of His greater calling on your life!

A PINK Woman is the very embodiment of God's Spirit. She is a woman of the highest degree, she seeks to be in the best health and condition emotionally, spiritually and physically! She is enthusiastic and ardent, passionate in her pursuit of God and her God-given identity that draws her to her purpose. Because she knows her identity, she is meaningful and intentional, she is full of determination in the purpose for which she finds herself uniquely designed and fit to accomplish.

She is specifically placed and arranged in order - this makes her very effective. Not only this, she values her position and takes her place in the body. She seizes the moment with great effect. She is a woman of influence and is confident. Her feet are shod in readiness. She is well equipped and prepared to face not only the daily challenges of balancing her family, work and spiritual life, but also to stand in the face of the most difficult circumstance taking responsibility, holding herself in dignity and acting on behalf of herself or others in ways that reflect the Spirit and nature of God at work within her.

You see... You don't have to be a member of Gateway Church to THINK PINK! The only qualification is God's Spirit at work in YOU as a WOMAN. Rise up Women of God and THINK! PINK! Make a positive difference in the world around you for the Kingdom of God!

I. AM. PINK. 

For more information on PINK! Gateway Church's Ministry for women visit pink.gatewaypeople.com 

Come Away to A Quiet Place...

There is a picture that hangs in my creative space of our home.



I purchased it last Spring because it reminds me of the "safe place" I got when I meet with God. My "safe place" is a farm house set in a valley harvest field of wheat. The house is old and being restored, it has a large wrap around front porch with clapboard siding.

Rocking chairs grace the front porch and I am not allowed to go inside yet because God has been restoring my house. I love that picture. I love the warmth - the sun always shines there and the breeze always blows. On my second or third visit God the Father planted a host of flowers all around the house for me, and Jesus showed me around behind the house. A garden oasis waited with refreshing water and a cool, inviting atmosphere. I've seen the inside of the house when Jesus opened the door and gave me a peek inside. I felt joy in my heart knowing He is doing a special work in my life through this place. I often think... I honestly believe when I get to Heaven this will be my "room" in the Mansion Kingdom.

Jesus and I play on the porch - we play jacks and dance, oh how we dance. Sometimes He comes in a prince's royal uniform and other times he comes in a t-shirt and jeans. He always come as Jesus though. He meets me near the edge of the field each time and walks with me.

Today I'm going to share a journal entry from one of my "safe place" visits:



January 29, 2012

I stepped off the gravel path into Daddy's wheat field. The tall golden stalks of wheat brushed against my thighs as I met my King among the harvest. 

He stood a few paces ahead of me as the ripening grain swayed lazily in the breeze. The breeze invited me toward Him by gently caressing my skin and blowing the chestnut tendrils of hair away from my neck. I could hear Him whispering, "Come away, Beloved. Come away with Me." 

As I stepped closer, the dark curls on the back of His head swung away to reveal His fire filled eyes and welcoming smile. My heart fluttered a bit as I smiled back and lifted my hand to wave hello! 

He smiled and nodded pointing eastward toward the horizon where a safe barrier of mountains hemmed us in. His large, scarred hand reached for me just as I came to His side. 

In that moment the sun grew brighter and the breeze blew stronger nudging us out into the harvest field. 

"How are you, Michelle?" 

"I'm tired and a bit confused." 

We continued walking east toward the white farm house set in the midst of the harvest, still a good distance away. Even though I had come here many times, Jesus always met me and led me to our secret place. 

"Tell me about that sweet girl." 

"Well, there is a restlessness in my heart, Lord. I feel like what I am doing now is wearing me down. I guess I don't understand why I am still here. Can You help me with that?"

He smiled and warmth filled every inch of my being. The wheat stalks bent to make room for our gait drawing us ever closer to our special place. He squeezed my hand and pulled me close to His side. "You're here because I'm preparing you for the harvest, Michelle." 

"Am I safe?" I asked. "It doesn't feel safe and well it drains all my energy to stay here." 

"So why do you stay?" He asked. 

"Because You haven't told me I could go." 

He squeezed my hand again and peace overwhelmed my heart. "You're right, I haven't." 

I looked toward the ground and the white linen skirt that hid my bare feet as I took each step. 

"Will it be soon?" 

"IT IS TIME." 

"Time?" My heart picked up a beat or two at the sound of His Words.

"Yes. The birth pains are about to begin, but remember when your children were born?"

"Oh, Yes!" The memory of those three sweet days brought a giggle up into my throat. "Those days were three of my best days." 

"I know. You were frightened the first time, though. You didn't know what to expect and , well, Justin was overdue." 

"I remember. He was stubborn even then."

"So were you." The words hung there in the air between us for a moment, but the usual shame and guilt I would have felt over them in my past did not follow. He squeezed my hand again. 

"I know. I was rebellious, too." 

"Obviously!" He smiled once more and shook His head. "I'm glad that is behind you now." 

"Thank You." I saw the house growing nearer but wanted to know more. "What about that? "

"The labor was easy for you. This season will be an easy labor and it's time for this season to begin." 

I pulled at His hand and stopped. Tears began to cloud my view as I let His words settle in my heart. He turned toward me, His eyes beckoning me. "My heart is divided, Lord. I cannot have my heart set on two things." 

He stepped back, pulled me up under His strong, protective arm and whispered as He kissed my forehead. "I know."


I shuffled the last few steps there nestled beneath His arm. We took our time through the yard around the house. He smelled of Heaven, all soft and warm, like the wind and sunshine that beckoned us in. I could feel His heart beating against my arm. Safe. 

My bare toes tapped quickly up the wooden steps and paused at the top. Something felt different. I looked down at the usually rough, weathered floor boards. They were painted a crisp, clean white. 

I squealed in delight. Each time I visit the secret place, Daddy always surprises me with the work He has completed. 

Jesus laughed with me. "Do you love it?"

"Yes! Yes! Yes! It's beautiful." 

"Shall we?" He struck a formal pose and extended His arm to me. Soft music lilted off the breeze as I folded myself into His arms and we danced across the gleaming white boards. We twirled and danced all around. Our feet beating out a rhythm of unconditional love. 

My heart felt such joy, it felt like light and energy running through my veins. The more we danced, the more joy came up. We danced and danced until I crumpled in a giggling heap upon the porch. 

Overwhelmed. 

            By Love. 

Overwhelmed. 

             By Joy. 

Overwhelmed. 

             And Giddy. 

In the Presence of My Lord and King. 

I lay out on the porch and felt my breathing begin to ease as I rested there. Then I heard Daddy's voice. "Baby girl, come here." 

I pulled myself up off the floor and walked to Daddy's rocking chair. His large, canvas covered arms welcomed me into His lap. I nestled myself up against His chest and felt peace flood my soul as I rested there in Daddy's arms close to His heart. 

"My child, you are My daughter, My beautiful blessed child. I created you and am positioning you for greatness and vast influence. Your artwork is not your identity - your artwork expresses your identity. I made you creative - beautifully engaged with color and splendid things. I've given you words and humor and connectedness. 

"BE. THAT. GIRL. Beloved, and you will never be disappointed."

I sat with Daddy as He rocked me there on the whitewashed porch of our farm house until I fell asleep.

 

Wrapping my mind around things...

Got my thinking cap on and mulling over some things to write about today.... Can't wait to see what the Lord would have me say about these rolling thoughts of mine! 

Today: I choose...

Today, I choose to believe in MIRACLES!

Mark 16:14-18 (NKJV)  Later He appeared to the eleven as they sat at the table; and He rebuked their unbelief and hardness of heart, because they did not believe those who had seen Him after He had risen.  And He said to them, "Go into all the world and preach the gospel to every creature. He who believes and is baptized will be saved; but he who does not believe will be condemned. And these signs will follow those who believe: In My name they will cast out demons; they will speak with new tongues; they will take up serpents; and if they drink anything deadly, it will by no means hurt them; they will lay hands on the sick, and they will recover." (emphasis mine.)

May I ask a number of questions? It is my blog... So I'll ask the question. 

What did Peter believe that saved 3,000 people in one sitting? (Acts 2:4)

What did Paul believe that raised Eutychus from the dead? (Acts 20:1)

What did the people see and believe about Paul that they would seek to touch only the apron that had been in his presence and receive healing? (Acts 19:20)

In her study, Beloved Disciple, Beth Moore writes that early church history recounts that John was reportedly boiled and oil and miraculously lived. Grant R. Jeffrey also writes about the martyrdom of the Apostles that after being "boiled in oil" John was sentenced to prison on the isle of Patmos where he received the visions recorded in the book of Revelation. He was later released from prison, returning to served at the church of Edessa (modern day Turkey) and is the only apostle who died peacefully an old man. (Martyrdom of the Apostles) What did John believe that allowed him to receive  vision of Heaven and the diety of Christ in his last days while imprisoned under tormenting conditions AND. BEING. BOILED. IN. OIL. Wait... OIL. Oil in Scripture represents anointing and the Holy Spirit.... HMMM. That is a whole other blog post. 

What did Paul believe that delivered him from beatings, shipwrecks, stoning and caused demons to run after him shouting at him to do miracles? See 1 Corinthians 11:25 and Acts 16:16)

John 14:12-14 (NKJV)  "Most assuredly, I say to you, he who believes in Me, the works that I do he will do also; and greater works than these he will do, because I go to My Father. And whatever you ask in My name, that I will do, that the Father may be glorified in the Son. If you ask anything in My name, I will do it. (emphasis mine)

Jesus HEALED the sick, the maimed, the brokenhearted, the blind, the deaf, the demon-possessed, the lepers, and He raised the dead.

Some of the last words He spoke to His disciples before the cross: "...he who believes in me, the works I do, he will do also; and even greater works will he do..." IN. RED. LETTERS. Jesus said this. ANYONE who believes in Jesus has the same power that raised Him from the dead working and bringing life bodily within us and according to John 14 - through us. (Ephesians 1:19-20; Romans 8:11)

MY. JESUS. LIVES.

HIS. WORKS. NEVER. CEASE.

HE. STILL. HEALS.

HE. STILL. RAISES. THE. DEAD. TO. LIFE.

I. WILL. DO. THE. SAME. WORKS. JESUS. DID. HE. SAYS. I. WILL. DO. GREATER.

TODAY. I Choose To Believe!

Weeds and Roots

There is a yard I pass by on a regular basis that is full of weeds. They are often edged and mowed weeds, but nevertheless after the rains and the sun come on them a few days - the scraggly patches of dandelions and spiky leaved weed patches come right back. 

I've seen this man walking the little green Scott's spreader along his property lines and across the yard in recent weeks. The sprinklers are running not long after soaking in the nutritious fertilizer to feed the grass and kill the weeds. Just the other day I saw him out front spraying his yard down with some sort of "weed killer," and still, the rain, the wind and the sun comes and without delay the weeds pop up from the earth, choke out the grass and litter his lawn with their bristly leaves and undesired flowers.

The problem is not that the man has not attempted to take care of his lawn. He is just missing the most important step. It doesn't matter how many times you kill a weed, if you never dig up its roots... The weed will eventually poke it's scraggly little head up out of the ground and deface your lawn once again. 

I remember as a young girl, my father buying an undeveloped lot upon which he planned to build our family home. That summer, my family and I got out into that lot and worked one end to the other pulling small "sticker" weeds out of ground. My father gave us instruction and a stern warning: "Be sure not to drop any of the stickers on the ground because they will just come back." So, off we went across the yard with buckets, gloves and bags pulling weeds to make a yard safe for our feet to play. 

Just like the weeds... various sins and their influences return again and again until we cut it off at the root and extract it. The soul of man that is drawn to sin must be completely submitted to the Spirit of God and God must be allowed to do heart surgery to remove the weed-like spiritual cancers that come to us by generational inheritance, core lies, inner vows and judgments, hurts and traumas, as well as willful sin and demonic oppression.

In the Parable of the Sower Jesus compares those who hear the Gospel to fields where seed is sown.

Matthew 13:3-23 (NKJV)
Then He spoke many things to them in parables, saying: "Behold, a sower went out to sow. And as he sowed, some seed fell by the wayside; and the birds came and devoured them. Some fell on stony places, where they did not have much earth; and they immediately sprang up because they had no depth of earth. But when the sun was up they were scorched, and because they had no root they withered away. And some fell among thorns, and the thorns sprang up and choked them. But others fell on good ground and yielded a crop: some a hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty. He who has ears to hear, let him hear!"

And the disciples came and said to Him, "Why do You speak to them in parables?"

He answered and said to them, "Because it has been given to you to know the mysteries of the kingdom of heaven, but to them it has not been given. For whoever has, to him more will be given, and he will have abundance; but whoever does not have, even what he has will be taken away from him. Therefore I speak to them in parables, because seeing they do not see, and hearing they do not hear, nor do they understand. And in them the prophecy of Isaiah is fulfilled, which says: 'Hearing you will hear and shall not understand, And seeing you will see and not perceive; For the hearts of this people have grown dull. Their ears are hard of hearing, And their eyes they have closed, Lest they should see with their eyes and hear with their ears, Lest they should understand with their hearts and turn, So that I should heal them.'

"But blessed are your eyes for they see, and your ears for they hear; for assuredly, I say to you that many prophets and righteous men desired to see what you see, and did not see it, and to hear what you hear, and did not hear it.

"Therefore hear the parable of the sower: When anyone hears the word of the kingdom, and does not understand it, then the wicked one comes and snatches away what was sown in his heart. This is he who received seed by the wayside. But he who received the seed on stony places, this is he who hears the word and immediately receives it with joy; yet he has no root in himself, but endures only for a while. For when tribulation or persecution arises because of the word, immediately he stumbles. Now he who received seed among the thorns is he who hears the word, and the cares of this world and the deceitfulness of riches choke the word, and he becomes unfruitful. But he who received seed on the good ground is he who hears the word and understands it, who indeed bears fruit and produces: some a hundredfold, some sixty, some thirty." (Emphasis mine.)

So in the same vein of thought, I wanted to write about what we find in Scripture about weeds.

1. From the parable of the sower we come to understand two things that will keep us from reaching our potential and God-given destiny.

• Shallow Roots - Those seed that were planted on the rocky places received the word with joy, but then fell away. Why? Because they had not roots - the first strong storm that came along, the first wind that blew their way knocked them right out of the ground.


• The Cares of the World or "Weeds" - Think about the cares of the world, the deceitfulness of riches.. Where do these things take root in our lives. Comparison, Lack, Competition, Expectation... Generational Herigtage? These are the things of life which come to distract us, deter us and dissuade us from following the heart of God into our destiny.

2. Shallow Root Systems create instability. Our yard has a beautiful young Live Oak tree set in the middle of the downward slope of our front lawn. Last Spring we noticed that when the storms and wind came - the tree rocked and swayed from its roots in the wind. It looked as if at any moment a strong wind would come along and uproot our tree. 

The tree was not stable at all. It moved and swayed with the wind and the leaves and branches looked dull and on the verge of death. My husband got three stakes - three - and he tied the tree to each stake by a cord. He left a little slack in each line to keep the tree from being hurt, but the stakes planted firmly in the ground stabilized the tree and allowed it time to develop roots.

Where I came from we constantly reminded ourselves when our zeal for God threatened to compel us into territory that we were not prepared for that we wanted to both deep and wide into the things of the Lord.  The truth is you can be soaring high in your passion for God (5 miles high) but so unstable that you rock and sway each time a strong wind comes and blows your way, in other words, your roots only go about a half an inch deep.

We must be tied to our Father God, His Son, Jesus, and the Holy Spirit in order for our root system to go deep and for stability and balance to come to both our relationship with them and the way we relate to others both personally, professionally and in ministry. When the winds and storms come - they serve to reinforce our relationship with God rather than unearth our roots and destroy our foundation.

3. Deal with the Weeds! Weeds can honestly be anything from soul wounds and core lies carried through painful experiences or belief systems we've developed in our lives. They may include demonic oppression or just the sinful bent in our flesh man. The problem with weeds is they can look evil or they can look good. They can have thistles and thorns or they can have beautiful flowers that look harmless, but given the run of our life --- they take over and destroy us. A few things you may not consider weeds: People pleasing or peace keeping, ambition or an inordinate drive for wealth or success, insecurity or pride, shame or guilt, worry or anxiety, fear, deception, or dare I type it... Religion or legalism - being given to or controlled by anything that at it's source is not rooted in Grace or producing Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faithfulness, Gentleness and Self Control.  Really - anything or person that would keep you from rightly relating to others and God.

So how are we doing here? Are you noticing any instability in your root system or any weeds that might need tending? 

The Lord will guide you continually, And satisfy your soul in drought, And strengthen your bones; You shall be like a watered garden, And like a spring of water, whose waters do not fail.  -Isaiah 58:11 (NKJV) 

Allowing God to tend our Garden and identify the areas where weeding and staking the ground need to happen will make us more like Him - a reflection of His glory and image upon the earth!



 

Table Talk | Out of Context

Today at lunch we sat, in our usual fashion, around the conference table that doubles as our lunch table, and talked about life. You know how it goes when you eat with friends chatting like hens in the hen house... A subject comes up.

Today we were giving commentary on the move of God in the lives of women of a particular denomination when the name Stormy O'Martian came up.

DISCLAIMER: I have her books. I love her story and her writing. I believe she is a powerful witness to women in every denomination. BUT, what I shared must be heard in context. This is a cautionary tale that is not true in every circumstance, but sadly is not isolated to Stormie's books. It also happens with the Bible, preachers, and well it is the primary run of rumors... Taking things out of context.

The world stands full of hurting and wounded people. It remains one of the most heartbreaking facts I encounter every day in the service of ministry. They long desperately to be free, see change in their own lives and the lives of their families, but often don't know where to start the journey of becoming free.

A number of years ago I observed the journey of a woman, we'll call her Janet, who struggled in her relationships with her children and husband. She and another woman began to read and pray according to the principles of "The Power of a Praying Parent" as she understood them.

She spent hours on the phone talking and praying. She often raved about how wonderful it was to pray these things over her husband because she knew God was going to change HIM for her. At times it felt like she was saying God would avenge her pain through changing her husband and children.

Legally, in a purely biblical sense, the words she prayed were right. After all, there is sound doctrine and biblical principle behind the writing of Stormie O'Martian.

Still, somehow in all of that - her heart was not right. You see - no matter what the book, the process, the plan or the idea you pursue - if you do not have a humble heart, praying the very best of God for those around you... There is a chance you could miss the mark.

She convinced herself that she should not only pray this over her children, but also over her husband who did not have parents praying over him. His parents, though living, could be found to blame for the ill she suffered from her husband.

Did you get that?

She prayed "The Power of a Praying Parent" over her husband as well as her children.

Can you see a train wreck coming? 

The results were devastating. She became more and more resigned to her position of victim and martyr. She determined in her heart that God would not let her down because she was praying "in agreement with Him" all the good things in Stormie's book. She was certain he would vindicate her against them. She wanted them to come to an awareness of how bad they hurt her and feel her pain with her.

She continually spoke negatives things over and about her husband and children... And, often attributed the worst things to demonic activity. She preached and harped on her children (who were either near or living in adulthood) about the wickedness of their ways. In short, she sucked all the life out of her home with negative attitudes, negative speech and selfish motives.

Does this sound harsh?  Remember... I said this is a cautionary tale! 

A year after she began to pray this book over her family and her household, she was shocked by her family coming to her and saying, "You are toxic. You are hurting us and we want you to move out." 

Not just her husband, but her children as well.

She is now divorced after more than 25 years of marriage and estranged from her children by their choice. She remains wounded, but resolved that God will change her family's heart toward her. And, in a lot of ways, the entire experience has changed her.

She speaks less negatives and has cut out things in her life that she did to escape the pain of her reality. But, in a lot of ways, she is still convinced all those months she spent praying she did what God wanted her to do. Only God knows if that is true.

So what went wrong? 

She failed to realize the point of "The Power of  a  Praying Parent" is meant to be prayed over your children, not your husband. Because of her wounded perspective, she failed to realize that the book was not just about praying change into the lives of those around her, but the intention of the book was meant to change the heart of the mother toward her children and out of that heart the change would overflow into the lives of her kids.

And in the long run, she became so legalistic in her opinions and her attitudes about what her family wasn't that she herself would "PRAY" them into... She lost sight of the power of God to grow them up in a heartbeat if she would simply move out of His way.

Cautionary tales always have a... 

Moral of the story:

Speak Life & Focus on What God is Doing in YOU! 

As I consider all of this, I think of something my daughter said to me around Valentine's Day. I had purchased two cards for my husband that day. This is a tradition in my life. He often will receive two cards because I find it hard to choose.

I brought them in and looked them over in her presence. Both of the sentiments were extremely complimentary and flattering. But, after reading them several times I realized that one of the cards rang very true to our relationship, and the other card spoke to some things I desired in our relationship but had not yet come to pass. I spoke aloud, but mostly to myself... "I'll just give him this one, which sounds most like him today and I will save the other one for next year. In the meantime, I will spend the next year praying these things over him so that when I give it to him they will be true."

My daughter ha-rumped in disgust. I showed her the cards and explained my thoughts. She said, "Momma, that's just mean."

I said, "Wait..."

She said, "You ARE NOT going to tell him that are you? "

"Oh, No!" I said, "I wouldn't tell him that."

THE. OLD. SELF. She would have lorded it over him like a legal document. But this girl, the one who writes about it today she would not dare tell him about it. She would only give him the card next year and pray that he knows she loves him with all her heart and prays God's best for him every single day.

What I realized today as I wrote these words has blessed me beyond measure. God doesn't just want me to pray these things over my husband. He wants me to "Call things that are not as though they were..." (Romans 4:17).  He wants me to call my husband a gift, a wonderful husband, a man who is thoughtful and kind, who gives humbly and reflects the gentle strength of the Lord... To tell him he is a friend who listens with his heart and understands the importance of just being there with a hug and a smile, a companion who leads with love, integrity and faith, making it a joy and an honor to stand beside him because he is my love, my friend, and my companion. And even now, as I wait - I thank God for him each and every day.

Some of these things are true of my husband already. And some of these things lie in wait for the moment when God awakens his heart to them. I am content to have the promise and the opportunity to call forth the greatness and love of God into my husband's life by being a wife who speaks life over him in my heart, in my words and in my prayers.

Lord, Open the eyes of my heart to see my husband as you see him. 

Visit my friend Bridgit and her post on a similar subject: Wearing Someone Else's Armor 

100 Page Views A Day | A Bloggy Give-Away

100-a-day pageviews - Give-A-Way!

I will be giving away a 4x6 original piece of artwork on paper of your favorite verse of Scripture each week.

Entering to win is S.I.M.P.L.E.:

1. SIMPLY visit any post or page on my blog.

2. Leave me a comment on any blog post on my blog.

3. Link back to the Welcome page of my blog on your Facebook, Twitter or blog.

[ Grab this LINK: http://michellebentham.org/2011/01/14/welcome-2/ ]

RESULTS: Each day that my blog reaches 100 page views I will  pull the names from comments and enter them into a weekly drawing. Weekly Give-aways will begin Good Friday, April 6, 2012, and I will post results each Friday morning by 8:00 am!

LET THE PAGE VIEWING BEGIN!

Sign up Today! 

He Calls Me Wildflower

I stepped out into the field white with harvest. My mind raced ahead of my feet to the front steps of the old farmhouse where my Best Friend, the Father, and my Comfort waited for me. I ran my hands along the ripened buds of grain as they brushed against the soft linen skirt covering my thighs.

I found myself giddy and little bursts of laughter began to bubble up from the inside of my heart. Just then, a hand slipped into mine and I looked to my right. My Best Friend came up beside me. The dark curls of his ebony hair glistened in the sun. His eyes captured me with tender affection and safety 

He smiled sweetly at me and I laughed all the more.

"I'm so glad I decided to come here today." 

He laughed, too. "Me, too. We have a surprise for you."

I squealed with excitement."Let's race."

We bolted out through the wheat field towards the top of the hill. As I pressed my legs upward to the top I came up short at the sight of my little farmhouse. The white wash scrubbed away by time and the weather. The floorboards of the wrap-around porch were a faint gray. I squinted my eyes and drew shade over them with my hand to make out what I thought I had seen.  The Father sat in His rocker on the porch awaiting my arrival. I could see the dark blue overalls in the shade of the wood-shingled awning covering the porch. 

Still... I could not put my finger on what might be different. I felt my Friend come up beside me as I continued to try to get my bearings and my breath. "What do you think?"

I paused. looked to my Friend and then back to the farmhouse. Suddenly, my eyes danced across row upon row of brightly colored flowers in varying shapes and sizes had been planted all along the porch on every side of the house. My heart skipped in delight! "I love them..."

He took my hand again and led me skipping down the hill to my Father's side. 

~~~~~

A few years ago my husband and I went through leadership presbytery at our church. Presbytery is a time when leaders who are gifted in the prophetic (encouragement, exhortation, edification and comfort) pray over your names and then come to give you words.

One of the words I received had to do with Wildflowers.

She shared:

Well, Michelle, this is what I feel like the Lord wants to say to you. I just, what I heard was that you were a wild flower, perfect and beautiful. You dance with delight and I am so pleased. Your heart of worship is pure, true and strong. I smell a sweet fragrance around you when you dance. I just heard, “Dance, dance, dance!” I don’t know if you dance, but maybe He wants you to dance. Worship Me like never before! I want to spend time with you and I want you to know Me.

 "A Wildflower is a flower that can be hidden on a hill only for My eyes or it can be for the pleasure of any man. That’s how I have made you. You minister to Me, but you also minister to others. You are soft and sweet and you draw people to you."

I remember my friend telling  a story about God telling her she is a Lily. She said she didn't like that because, "What do Lilies do? Lilies don't do anything - they just be." She, like many of us in this life, learns daily to be comfortable with who God says she is and to embrace the fact that He loves the she Just Is.

Just like my friend, when I received the word about being a wildflower, I do not think I fully appreciated what God was saying to me about how He sees me.

 That is until I read Bridgit's blog  over the weekend.

"God gives attention to Wildflowers" was the title of her post. As I read the Message version of Matthew 6:30-33 I was reminded that Matthew 6 also came up in my presbytery. CAN. YOU. SAY. DIVINE. APPOINTMENT?

Now read Matthew 6:30-33, "“Has anyone by fussing in front of the mirror ever gotten taller by so much as an inch? All this time and money wasted on fashion—do you think it makes that much difference? Instead of looking at the fashions, walk out into the fields and look at the wildflowers. They never primp or shop, but have you ever seen color and design quite like it? The ten best-dressed men and women in the country look shabby alongside them. If God gives such attention to the appearance of wildflowers—most of which are never even seen—don’t you think he’ll attend to you, take pride in you, do his best for you? What I’m trying to do here is to get you to relax, to not be so preoccupied with getting, so you can respond to God’s giving. People who don’t know God and the way he works fuss over these things, but you know both God and how he works. Steep your life in God-reality, God-initiative, God-provisions. Don’t worry about missing out. You’ll find all your everyday human concerns will be met.” (Matthew 6: 28 – 33 MSG.)

The presbyter shared:

Michelle, when I prayed for you the first two words that came so clearly were that you are gifted and that you’re treasured. And, the Scripture was in Matthew 6:21 where it says, “For where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.”(AMP) And I really feel like what the Lord said to me was You are…Because you have…You know where your treasure is. You know where your heart is. You have chosen to plant your heart in Him, and He sees you as a treasure. He sees you as just a very, very precious thing to be cherished, and He does cherish you.

This sent me on a headlong study of wildflowers in Scripture. As usual, the digging led me to treasure. Funny how God uses a string of seemingly unrelated events to connect me deeply to His heart for me by way of treasure map. Remember scavenger hunts when you were a kid... That is what it felt like as I perused the list of Scriptures in my Bible software that contained the word wildflower.

When God calls me Wildflower.  He reminds me that Wildflowers can be out on the side of a hill in plain view, anyone can see them. Or... They can be set in a vase in the HOUSE where they are enjoyed for a season. Or... They can be hidden in nature - a treasure waiting to be found or simply for the amusement of God.

He has also shown me that Wildflowers are fragile yet resilient. They grow out of rocks, and often in conditions where domesticated plants would not survive. Wildflowers welcome new seasons, they are colorful and inviting, clothed in splendor - they do not labor and spin needlessly for their provision because God takes care of all their needs.

But then, the other day I stumbled upon Psalm 30:11 (MSG):

"You did it: You changed my wild lament into whirling dancing, You ripped off my mourning bands and decked me in WILDFLOWERS." (emphasis mine)

OH. YES. HE. DID.

Now here is the sweet part. Remember my post about being my "Colorful Self?"

After my sessions with Dr. Mungadze Jesus came and gave me a garland of Wildflowers in all the colors of myself to wear around my head. He said, "The colors will always be with you right where they belong."

You see, the colors represented seasons of trauma when my brain protected me from the pain I would have otherwise felt. They represent me - who I am and have been all along - at various ages when trauma and pain came in and my immature mind could not process it. Dr. Mungadze guided me through the journey to unlocking the colors of my brain and discovering that they all - in their unique way represent the beautiful and magnificent creation of God that is me.

HE. CALLS. ME. WILDFLOWER. and I love it. 

For more about my journey with Dr. Mungadze and the colors of my brain visit Self Awareness, Self Observation and Hearing God,  or It Ain't Easy Being Green.

Joy, Anointing and Provision

 

A few weeks ago I was reading Scriptures on trees when I came across this passage:

And wine that makes glad the heart of man, Oil to make his face shine, And bread which strengthens man's heart. ~Psalms 104:15 (NKJV) 

This Scripture reverberated straight through to my heart immediately. I kept thinking, wine, oil and bread were significant to Jesus before His crucifixion and were also prominent in the worship at the temple. HMMMM! I wrote it down and made a note to come back to it as soon as I finished the study on trees. Last night, I began to peruse different passages that include the three elements of wine, oil and bread.



Jesus experienced and imparted wine, oil and bread in his final days on earth.

At the Passover meal, wine, bread and oil are prominent in the presentation and observance of the meal. The same olive oil that was used to accent and prepare meals could also be used to produce light, anoint the priests of the temple for ministry, and  produce medicines and perfume when mixed with herbs and fragrant plants. It was even used in the preparation of the bodies of the dead for burial.

Then, six days before the Passover, Jesus came to Bethany, where Lazarus was who had been dead, whom He had raised from the dead. There they made Him a supper; and Martha served, but Lazarus was one of those who sat at the table with Him. Then Mary took a pound of very costly oil of spikenard, anointed the feet of Jesus, and wiped His feet with her hair. And the house was filled with the fragrance of the oil. Then one of His disciples, Judas Iscariot, Simon's son, who would betray Him, said,  "Why was this fragrant oil not sold for three hundred denarii and given to the poor?"  This he said, not that he cared for the poor, but because he was a thief, and had the money box; and he used to take what was put in it. But Jesus said, "Let her alone; she has kept this for the day of My burial. For the poor you have with you always, but Me you do not have always." ~John 12:1-8 (NKJV) 

When the hour had come, He sat down, and the twelve apostles with Him. Then He said to them, "With fervent desire I have desired to eat this Passover with you before I suffer;  for I say to you, I will no longer eat of it until it is fulfilled in the kingdom of God."  Then He took the cup, and gave thanks, and said, "Take this and divide it among yourselves; for I say to you, I will not drink of the fruit of the vine until the kingdom of God comes."  And He took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, "This is My body which is given for you; do this in remembrance of Me." Likewise He also took the cup after supper, saying, "This cup is the new covenant in My blood, which is shed for you. But behold, the hand of My betrayer is with Me on the table. And truly the Son of Man goes as it has been determined, but woe to that man by whom He is betrayed!" Then they began to question among themselves, which of them it was who would do this thing. ~Luke 22:14-23 (NKJV)

Anointed. Oil throughout Scripture represents anointing, and it also represents the presence of the Holy Spirit. In Isaiah 61, God promises to give, through the Messiah, the oil of gladness for those who mourn: An anointing of joy in exchange for a season of grief. 

Joy. In the Scripture that drew my heart to these three words, wine makes glad the hearts of men. In the story of Jesus' final hours before his arrest, wine became the representative of His blood that would be shed through beating, suffering and crucifixion. "This cup is the new covenant in My blood, which is shed for you. " 

Our former pastor used to say that when someone received Salvation that the angels in heaven were rejoicing over the decision. A sacrifice that brings joy. Lord, restore to us the Joy of our salvation. 

Wine makes the heart glad, the new covenant wine means release, redemption and restoration. That makes my heart very glad.

Provision. Under the Old Testament laws, worship at the temple and access to God always began with sacrifice. Just like when Abraham went up to Mt. Moriah to sacrifice his son, Isaac, at God's command. There was a sacrifice required. Abraham believed God would provide the sacrifice and was willing to give up his precious son to be obedient to God. In the end, God provided the lamb for the sacrifice. And, Abraham called that day upon the name of the Lord, Jehovah Jireh - "The Lord will see to it" (Genesis 22). One Hebrew commentary I read on this name of God indicated that from a Jewish perspective. This name of God, Jehovah Jireh, does not simply mean that God will provide, but that He, in Himself, is all the provision we will ever need. He is all sufficient to us in every way.

In a more perfect way, Jesus went to the cross as our provision. He became a curse for us so that we would no longer endure the curse. Scripture tells us that His strength is made perfect in our weakness (2 Corinthians 2:19). And He took bread, gave thanks and broke it, and gave it to them, saying, "This is My body which is given for you; do this in remembrance of Me." 

 The wine brings the joy of salvation, the oil carries His presence, His anointing and His glory, and the bread makes provision that satisfies our every need. All of which are provided to us through Jesus - the mediator of our Covenant of grace.

Five Minute Fridays: Seasons of Change

Today, I'm joining my friend Alex and GypsyMama in Five Minute Fridays! 

GO. Life five years ago… We were, as we are now, in transition.

My family and I were in our second year of grieving the passing of my oldest son, Justin. As spring unfolded our lives were in a season of closing out the old and birthing the new. I stood on the precipice of breakthrough with God and felt Him urging me ever forward.

That season led to a move smaller home, selling one vehicle and leaving my position and our previous church home for the larger doors of Gateway Church. I spent my afternoons working in the After School program taking tuition, sending out notices and preparing Object Lesson notes, and finding the balance of life again after facing my worst confessed fear-the death of my child.

This is also the year that I began my first ministry group to grieving parents. I spent the week of Spring Break that year painting and decorating a room so this time five years ago I was advertising and contacting grieving parents in three counties to let them know we would be available to them if they had a need.

As I prepared to serve the hurting in our community, God did something that has led me to the season of change I am in today. He awakened my heart to the artist inside of me. I started with a few canvases and acrylic paints for the walls and ended up teaching the After School kids to paint from God’s perspective. I love that God moves in mysterious ways… So, here I am jumping into the deep end of the ocean with Him again. STOP. 

That season of our lives turned us upside down and inside out. But, through it we have found our way to a new place, one of hope, joy, love and grace to weather any storm. The last five years have been the most healing of my life.

Stirred Up

I arose early on Saturday morning. After dressing and loading a few of my paintings into the Explorer, I pulled out of the driveway of our small brick home on Pebblebrook Drive and headed for Southlake.

As I drove to our main campus just off of State Highway 114 I caught a glimpse of white- gray clouds streaking across the pale blue canvas of God's sky. Faint yellows and pinks danced across the eastern horizon as the last glimpse of sunrise slipped away. Thank You, Lord, for this magnificent morning. 

My heart filled with expectation. Worship played quietly on the radio as the deserted streets drew me closer to our corporate hour of prayer.

I stepped out onto the blacktop of the parking lot and felt a chill breeze dance across my skin. In another half hour the Pink warriors would be assembled and contending for Heaven to come to earth during Pink Impact.

I carried my paintings through the double set of glass doors and entered the large lobby to the Children's Ministry area on the north side of the building. My feet moved quickly toward the elevator in the broad, darkened corridor that leads to Grounded, the coffee bar, and the grand lobby area near the sanctuary. Anticipation and expectation fluttered all about my heart and soul as I began to pray quietly in the Spirit. "Ah-lee Ah-na, Shautee, emay elah."  

I pressed the grooved metal button summoning the elevator to fetch me up. As I waited,  I watched the handful of staff members moving hastily through the other end of the building. Each of them with their task list setting in motion the events leading to worship weekend at Gateway Church. Thank You, Lord, for Gateway Church. 

The silent moment interrupted by the quiet humming of the elevator as it landed behind the large stainless steel doors beside me. At the ring of the bell the doors swung open and I entered the elevator, pressing the button labeled two before the doors closed and ushered me upstairs.

As I entered the room I noticed the "General" of our chosen group standing at the podium discussing the music she had selected with a tall young man whose curly brown hair appeared damp. I smiled as I walked over to the floor to ceiling panels of glass on the west side of the room and began to arrange the paintings against the backdrop of brown and muted, winter colored vegetation separating the grounds of the church from the large ponds with a trio of fountains shooting water high into the air.

Katherine greeted me and walked to the window. She began to pray in the Spirit as I had been doing while waiting for the elevator downstairs. We talked a bit in between prayers as we waited for the others to arrive.

After setting up my paintings and claiming a seat in the circle of chairs near the door, I looked back to Katherine. Her tall frame standing at attention in the window praying intently. Her hair is a thin layer of tight curls in dark black and gray all around the crown of her head. She wore a turquoise sweater with jeans and her rich, elegant voice broke the silence of the room with rich tones of prayer in a language I could not understand.  Thank You, Lord, for Katherine. 

A few minutes later, Carin entered like a ray of sunshine straight from the throne room of God. Her presence carries both authority and the lightness of joy. Her sweet melodic voice joined in with Katherine's and my own. We walked about, gazing out at the fountains and talking intermittently about the paintings and the beautiful view as we began to stir up the things of God and His Holy Spirit among us in prayer. Thank You, Lord, for Carin. 

A few minutes later another warrior enters the room, and then another until twenty or more make their way in-one by one by one. Women of diverse age, race, style, and position in life mingled together, assembling themselves along the wall and in chairs near the door. A few of us bowed our bodies and our hearts low. Many of us walked about the room calling forth the things we heard God speaking over us as we prayed.

Rich, broad prayer languages circulated among us. Words swirled and danced upon the air, passing through the ceilings and walls - like the smoke of the incense going up before the Lord in the temple's Holy Place.

The smoke of the incense, mixed with the prayers of God's holy people, ascended up to God from the altar where the angel had poured them out. ~ Revelation 8:4 (NLT)

Katherine began to speak and pray all in the same breath. She exhorted us to stir up the presence of God, to pray the things of His heart for the women - estimated at more than 5,000 - who will be coming to Pink Impact in a handful of weeks.

God brought Jude 20 to my mind.

Jude 1:20-25 (NKJV)
²⁰ But you, beloved, building yourselves up on your most holy faith,praying in the Holy Spirit, ²¹ keep yourselves in the love of God, looking for the mercy of our Lord Jesus Christ unto eternal life. ²² And on some have compassion, making a distinction; ²³ but others save with fear, pulling them out of the fire, hating even the garment defiled by the flesh. 

²⁴ Now to Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, And to present you faultless Before the presence of His glory with exceeding joy, ²⁵ To God our Savior, Who alone is wise, Be glory and majesty, Dominion and power, Both now and forever. Amen.

We called down glory from on high. We welcomed the Lord - invited Him to reveal His glory both that day and throughout the days leading up to and during Pink Impact in April. We prayed for mothers of prodigals, women who've been cast off, wounded, broken, scorned and fragile. We called forth destiny, hope and joy. We prayed down the Holy Spirit in that hour.

And so we stirred praying on and on - non stop for three quarters of an hour. Then Katherine called forth anyone who needed prayer and I went forward. I seated myself in the center of the circle and the many women among us came to me and lay hands on me. They prayed for me and for my request. But, more than this they prayed for the women like me who would be coming. Women seeking destiny and purpose. Women on their way to the next season of their journey. Women who would be prepared and promoted. We asked for revelation for wisdom and for truth.

We warred against the enemy in the convention of prayer. Our faiths, our hearts and our lives linked together with our Savior in common. Our prayers forever intertwined with the lives of those we may never know because we stirred it up.

Others came forward. One to confess while another was suffering physically. Still another came to ask for favor for her ministry and the lives of unborn children. These women who reside so safely in God's heart have found their way into my own as we have prayed together - stirring ourselves up in our most holy faith, praying in the Spirit and believing God for signs, wonders, and the tiniest details of the massive undertaking that brings influence and inspiration to the women of Gateway Church and all the lives we touch beyond our walls.

To Him be the glory, forever and ever. AMEN. INDEED!

Our Time Is Short

'In this Year of Jubilee, each of you shall return to his possession. Leviticus 25:13 (NKJV) 

I remember not so many days ago, spending hours daily digging so deep into the Word - so much so I barely came up for air. I would write blog post after blog post and page after page of the brimming revelation overflowing from my cup.

I took a position at our church in 2009 and working full time, being a wife and mom, and volunteering in ministries at my church left little time for me to join in on fun meme's on the internet or to write the deep well of revelation in my blog posts as I had once done. I moved my blog, consolidated it down. But life's pace left little room for the community and the wonder I found typing out my journey with God on the internet pages of the world wide web.

As I started this year, a word had been brewing in my heart for several months. I'd shared it with a few people over the weeks that closed out 2011 and opened up 2012.

The Word is Jubliee.

The year of Jubilee can be found fully described in Leviticus 25. Basically, every 50 years the nation of Israel would come upon a year of Jubilee. The previous 49 would be in preparation for this season of rest, release and restoration.

 Then you shall cause the trumpet of the Jubilee to sound on the tenth day of the seventh month; on the Day of Atonement you shall make the trumpet to sound throughout all your land.  And you shall consecrate the fiftieth year, and proclaim liberty throughout all the land to all its inhabitants. It shall be a Jubilee for you; and each of you shall return to his possession, and each of you shall return to his family.  That fiftieth year shall be a Jubilee to you; in it you shall neither sow nor reap what grows of its own accord, nor gather the grapes of your untended vine. For it is the Jubilee; it shall be holy to you; you shall eat its produce from the field. Leviticus 25:9-12 (NKJV)

I knew this word meant a destiny kind of release for me, but I also knew the term of 50 years was significant to the biblical principle of Jubilee. Someone recently asked me if this is my Jubilee year because I am turning 50 and the answer to that question is most certainly not.

Not yet anyway.

I am nearly 42 years young, and seriously considering turning the clock backwards with each new  birthday I greet. So I began to ask the Lord, How can this be my year of Jubilee when I am not yet 50? 

The Lord remains tender and sweet with me, even when I'm questioning what He is telling me is true.  A few years ago I typed up Isaiah 61:1-3 on parchment paper and framed them for a Bible study we did in the women's ministry at our former church. After the study had completed I brought the framed scripture home and placed it on my husband's bedside table. As I asked that question the Lord reminded me of these precious words defining the call of Jesus as the Messiah. But this time I read a little further...

Isaiah 61:1-7 (NKJV)
¹ "The Spirit of the Lord God is upon Me, because the Lord has anointed Me to preach good tidings to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives, and the opening of the prison to those who are bound;  to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord, And the day of vengeance of our God; to comfort all who mourn,  to console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness; that they may be called trees of righteousness, The planting of the Lord, that He may be glorified."

 And they shall rebuild the old ruins, they shall raise up the former desolations, And they shall repair the ruined cities, the desolations of many generations. Strangers shall stand and feed your flocks, And the sons of the foreigner shall be your plowmen and your vinedressers. But you shall be named the priests of the Lord, they shall call you the servants of our God. You shall eat the riches of the Gentiles, and in their glory you shall boast.  Instead of your shame you shall have double honor, and instead of confusion they shall rejoice in their portion. Therefore in their land they shall possess double; everlasting joy shall be theirs.

As I read these words over and over again God reminded me that in Luke 4 Jesus proclaims these scriptures fulfilled over Himself.

 
"The Spirit of the Lord is upon Me, Because He has anointed Me To preach the gospel to the poor; He has sent Me to heal the brokenhearted, To proclaim liberty to the captives And recovery of sight to the blind, To set at liberty those who are oppressed; To proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord."  Then He closed the book, and gave it back to the attendant and sat down. And the eyes of all who were in the synagogue were fixed on Him.  And He began to say to them, "Today this Scripture is fulfilled in your hearing." Luke 4:18-21 (NKJV)

As I read these words in the context of what God was showing me I realized that Jesus is our Jubilee. The Deuteronomic Code and the Levitical Codes established many centuries earlier fulfilled by Jesus Christ. He came to declare Jubilee over each of our lives. Rest, Release, Redemption, Restoration and Revelation come to us in our season of Jubilee.

As I bring this post to a close, I am awash with a grateful heart. God is bringing my season of administrative work in the church to an end and launching on a more uncertain but more wonderful journey into my destiny. In July I will leave my position at the church and return to writing, and explore more of what my art means to me and to others around me. And, I will add to these a blog radio show that will likely begin in late July or early August.

I am excited about this new season of my life. I am the most at peace I have ever been and greatly anticipate the work of the Lord that is coming in the days ahead. Would you pray for me as I make the tranisiton?

Women of Faith

[caption id="attachment_5825" align="alignleft" width="225" caption="Angie Smith ~ Women Of Faith | One Day Event - Dallas, TX 2/25/2012"][/caption]

My daughter and I had an interesting conversation earlier this week. It centered on a conflict she found herself in over her church's encouragement of the women to attend Women of Faith and her realization that in this season of life she needs people who will offer her more Scripture and insight into God's Word.

Women of Faith is an amazing ministry event for women of all ages. I've attended one two-day event in the last decade, and find that the time of year the event rolls around is often a strong deterrent to attending the conference. My one experience with them prior to this year prompted me to purchase a membership and sign the women of our church up for another conference the year that God moved us from that small Baptist community to the much larger non-denominational Gateway Church. I did not attend the conference that year - giving my ticket to a friend who had received a diagnosis of breast cancer just months before our departure.

My daughter shared that she was conflicted about attending when she wanted to also attend a young women's retreat offered at the same time of year through Gateway Church. When I asked her why she did not want to attend Women of Faith, she shared how she was interested in growing deeper in God's Word and the flavor of the Women of Faith speakers seemed to be more testimonial than teaching on Scripture. I was impressed with this young woman's heart, who yearns for the deep things of God and understood her concern.

I encouraged her to do what would be most beneficial to her. Then an unexpected blessing came my way in the form of a VIP pass to the Women of Faith One Day event this weekend in Dallas. I attended the power packed seven hour event and found myself blown away. Angie Smith, Christine Caine and Andy Andrews shared deeply insightful messages packed with Scripture and a strong prompting to allow God to transform your heart and mind, heal your pain and wounds from the past and move forward into your destiny and calling. Each speaker complimented the one before and the message resounded with the hearts of the women attending today.

To top it off, on the way to the auditorium, I missed my exit for 75 and ended up taking a detour driving in circles around Deep Ellum for 20 minutes trying to find my way to the Southern Methodist University campus where the event was being held. Before I got lost I was talking to God about the day when I asked, "God, would you save me a seat on the front row? Not because I deserve it more than anyone else, but just to let me know you are with me today and you have something special in mind just for me."

When I arrived, women were packed in the foyer of the small auditorium facility. I was running a few minutes behind the doors opening which had not been my plan at all. But, still I knew I would sit in a good seat.

I found my way down a side aisle to the front and asked an usher, "Where is the VIP section?"

She smiled and said, "Anything that is not reserved in the first five rows."

I walked down the third row to near the center of the auditorium and sat my things down in the last of four open seats in the second before the "Reserved for Staff" signs began.

God had saved me this seat. To my surprise, when the music for worship started the speakers walked in and I found myself directly behind Christine Caine, Angie Smith and Andy Andrews. :)

God is really sweet, isn't he? During one of the breaks I had the opportunity to visit with a top level woman on the Women of Faith team and she asked me to make sure to connect with her.

There was this moment, during the conference, when Angie Smith asked all the mothers who had lost children to stand up. I would say a little more than a third of the women rose to their feet at that moment. She honored us in such a precious way and God really came down and ministered to some deeply wounded hearts at that moment. When we were sitting down, Angie was acknowledging how she had prayed for us and the word she heard from the Lord was "Mercy."

As we sat, a woman visibly grieving and weeping cried out something to Angie that undid us all. We would later learn she called out, "My daughter's name was Mercy."

I ran into that sweet woman during the break and asked her if she was the one who cried out. She said yes and shared that her loss had only been a month prior. My heart ached for her as I felt the pain wash over me that she must have felt. I hugged her tight and told her I would keep praying for her as I felt the pain she was expressing in my own heart. And for God to so sweetly affirm that He knew what she was feeling by sharing her daughter's name with Angie. Oh Lord, Your mercies truly are new every morning.

I heard another story of a mother who had lost a 2 year old daughter and the ministry that had been born out of her loss. Blessings and Butterflies. I realized that the Lord had ministered to a few of my bereaved friends through this woman's ministry while I was attending a local support group during the first few years of my grief journey. How amazingly small our world really is simply amazes me.

Well, I don't know if there is more that I can share except - if YOU have the chance to attend one - It is worth the price of admission. I didn't have to pay it but gladly will next year. Visit their website: www.womenoffaith.com to learn more about these One Day events and when they will be coming to a city near you!

The Holy Spirit and Google

I received an email from Word Press today. An unexpected comment had come through on my Scripture and Prayer blog. As I read the comment, tears began to form in my eyes. A woman going through a difficult time woke in the middle of the night under tremendous attack.

She went to her computer and googled "Tonight's Holy Scriptures." Google populated a link to my blog. She reached out for prayer and she received it.

www.scriptureandprayer.com 

Will join me in praying for her?

Marriage Letters: What We Do - Your Job, My Job

I believe every week I will be a day late to the party, but will join in writing a letter to my dear sweet husband each week. I've got a story to tell about waiting on the Lord with my husband. I will be jumping in on Marriage letters moving forward! I'd love it if you'd join me, too. Thank you to my friend, Alex at Journey to Beauty who highlighted this wonderful writing meme. And to Amber at The Runamuck for inspiring this very public display of affection. BRAVO!

Dear Scott,

I sometimes wonder how we've made it these thirteen-some-odd years. Still, you are steady, constant and unwavering. On the other hand, I am tangent driven, off on a new adventure, jumping on the next wave out of this season of our life and on to the next.

We have watched five babies grow in the last thirteen years, two of them your natural children and three of them mine. We have experienced the loss of the eldest boy, and sent him ahead to heaven. We have somehow found our way not only to survive, but thrive.

The last four months have been a whirlwind of expectancy. In September, the gentle stirrings of change began in my heart compelling me forward to destiny appointments and decisions. Today, I am pregnant again with possibility and overwhelmed by the love of a man who will support and encourage me even when he is so uncertain. Still here we sit moving ever closer to my dream and another season of life where I remain at home to pursue my dreams of inspired communication, art and yes, even a radio show.

At the end of a long day of managing tasks and computing, taking phone calls and praying over the phone with the hurting, aching souls of our church and community I rush out the door of the ministry center and down the street across town to pick up my best friend and my precious love from his job as a Tele-Comm Cable Splicer here on the Tarrant County side of the metroplex.

I think about most of our marriage and how we have made sacrfices - you've made sacrifices so that I could be at home with my children, volunteer in ministry at the church and to discover with great confidence my God-given identity and my unique purpose on this earth. All the while you work with your hands in the wind, sunshine and rain with an odd mix of men as varying in age as they are in interest, personality and perspective.

So much of what I do is about people. After all, "At Gateway Church we are all about people." Sometimes I my job requires wisdom in dealing with a crisis, or just discerning about the issue at hand. Other times I need all the task skill I can muster - which often still comes in a smidge under what is really required.

While I am off negotiating, facilitating and administrating relationships between people and pastors, people and ministry, or people and God you are off wiring them for sound.

Your job is becoming a lost art in the world of wi-fi, cellular services. But, you get up and go to work every single day without fail to wire up the neighborhoods, businesses and communities for a nationally recognized telecommunications company. You often tell me about MDUs, T1 circuits, cut-a-rounds, cut 48s and terminal tails. Honestly, it makes my head spin a bit. I don't know an MDU from a Terminal Tail - I wonder if I event got the initials right on the MDU.

I cannot begin to fathom how you do that day in and day out. My mind and my heart could not take the mundane routine of wire splicing and troubleshooting communication problems, but you thrive there. You creative problem solve, do your job with excellence and take great pride in your work. And on the really tough days you come in frustrated and vent about Yahoo who didn't do X so you had to do Y and it should have been Z in the first place. Yep, that is really what happens on a daily basis for you.

You used to call me and tell me things like you'd been in a fender bender or the Union has circulated rumors of a strike. And, I - Mrs. Opinionated & Dramatic - would emote wildly and vomit my feelings all over you. That is until I learned to pray.

We've prayed down every threat of a strike, layoff and through a few seasons of "PHASE" as a result of those accidents that you wanted me to reassure you about. Over time, as my faith in God and you grew, I learned how to encourage you, tell you everything - including you and me - would be okay no matter what happened, but truthfully in my heart I was crying out to God. I reminded Him about His promises and plans and how He would not allow His children to be ashamed or go about begging for bread. I would declare and decree until the roof would blow off the house that YOU would not lose your job, go on strike or get cut in a round of lay offs - and SO FAR... So Far, God has agreed.

This morning as I prayed for you just before I dropped you off at work I got a chuckle in my heart as I heard God whisper that you are a COMMUNICATION SPECIALIST. Why do I chuckle? Because the last thing you would like to do is COMMUNICATE. See - it really is Laugh-Out-Loud funny. But you are, you help connect other people together and facilitate their ability to communicate - one to another - every day of your life.

That is a noble, thankless task that people often do not even recognize as valuable. Still, it is not lost on me. As we jump off the diving board of life into the deep end of this ocean we're swimming in, I pray that I never cease to thank you and praise you for the way you stick so I can fly and soar and be all that God created me to be.

Now that I think about our jobs are not that different - we are both in the business of facilitating relationships it is just the means by which we do it that come out so different.

I love you, Mr. Bentham, even though you still owe me one for telling our cousin I am a "glorified secretary." :) Not really, but that did stick in my craw a bit when you said it.

I love you very much,

Michelle

Marriage Mondays: What I've Waited For

I'm a day late to the party, but decided to join in on Valentine's Day writing a letter to my dear sweet husband. I've got a story to tell about waiting on the Lord with my husband. I will be jumping in on Marriage Mondays moving forward! I'd love it if you'd join me, too. Thank you to my friend, Alex at Journey to Beauty who highlighted this wonderful writing meme. And to Amber at The Runamuck for inspiring this very public display of affection. BRAVO!

For My Man,

Patience and a quiet spirit have never come easy for me. I’m an instant gratification girl… If I know you’ve bought me a gift, I want it right away. If I know that something good is coming I'd rather leap to the other side enjoying the benefit and success of it. After thirteen years of marital bliss mingled with some not so marital bliss I think you know enough to know I am hopeful, expectant and want it now!

Still, patience is something God has cultivated in my life for several  years. The waiting game has tested and broken me many times but never so sweetly as it has in my relationship with you.

Today, I walked into my office at work and everyone was aflutter waiting for me to arrive. As I rounded the corner to my desk there on the filing cabinet tucked out of sight sat a dozen beautiful pink roses along with a card and my very favorite White Chocolate, White Chocolate Chip Nothing Bundt Cake.

For the last thirteen years, I have prayed, hoped and given up with a broken heart full of unmet expectations that you would bring me flowers and treats on Valentine’s Day. I’ve asked and hinted and finally demanded before... Well yes, throwing a fit as a realized I may never lay hold of the hope of my heart – that you would express value to me by bringing me gifts or notes of love because you know me well and wish to please me.

But then, God began to change my heart. I remember the day well just a few years ago, my birthday had passed again with not even a hint of a gift coming from you. When I asked you about it you said, “I hadn’t really planned on getting you anything.”

Crushed does not even begin to describe my emotions. I don't know why I expected more, but I did. So, I prayed. “God help me to see the gift you’ve given me in my husband. Help me see the way he chooses to express his love to me and not the expectations I have of what that should look like.”

I’ve received counsel and rebuke about how I am trying to change you, not appreciating you and considerably angry at you over this very issue. None of that came from you but, all of it rings so honestly true.

GUILTY.

I’ve tried my best to groom you into the romantic sap I imagined you would be in my childhood dreams of fairy tales, daring rescues and lavish love. All the while demeaning and devaluing the warrior spirit that God planted deep inside of you even before the foundation of the world.

A few weeks ago I made my heart’s desire known to you and you responded in love, and overwhelming affection in a way that was beyond what I had asked and imagined. I’ve waited more than thirteen years for today. To have the sweetest gifts delivered to my work before anyone arrived and to experience the love of my husband who knows me so well in such a precious way. I love each of the gifts because they show how well you know me. Still, the sweetest part of today – the thing that brought tears to my eyes – the card.

“I wonder if you know

how proud I am

to be your husband.

If you don’t, you need to.

When I stop to think about it,

It is such an incredible gift.

Of all the guys out there,

God chose me for you.

I’ve been given the privilege

Of walking through life

With someone so beautiful –

So smart, classy and supportive –

So amazing in so many ways.

 

I love you with all my heart,

Sweet Valentine of mine,

And thank God continually

For the blessing you are in my life.

 

I love you

Scott”

 

The Scripture on the inside cover of the card reads: “How fair and how pleasant you are O love, with your delights! Song of Solomon 7:6 NKJV”

Indeed – How fair and pleasant you are O love! My love, my mighty man of God. I value who you are and the way you have always stuck by this impatient, fly-by-night, instant gratification girl. I am so blessed and honored as your wife. I am also humbled by your gift of love today. I can truly say that today --- It has been worth the wait.

I love you, Scott Bentham, with all my heart.

So grateful to God that He has given me you!

Always,

Michelle

America | A Nation Going Under or Under God?

Tonight at Gateway Church in Southlake, Texas Glenn Beck shared his public testimony about how Jesus redeemed and saved him. He said, "We cannot fix our country, but we can fix ourselves." He went on to say that we may not be able to fix our country, but as Lord and Savior, Jesus can save both us as individuals and our country as He carries a big sword!!! Yes, indeed. Thank God for Glenn Beck.

Robert Morris, our beloved Senior Pastor, then took the platform and delivered a powerful message whose title was inspired by a speech by Ronald Reagan in 1984 where he said, "If we ever forget we are One Nation Under God, we will be a nation gone under..."

He gave three points on what will cause a nation to go under.

1. When judges rule. (Ruth1:1) When judges rule or "legislate from the bench" they take on a role that neither our founding fathers nor God intended for them to fulfill. Judges are to decide cases based on the laws and statutes of God and His laws. Which, by the way, the laws and statutes of God agreed with the original document our founding fathers drafted in the Constitutional conventions during the infancy of our nation.

JOIN.ME.ON.A.RABBIT.TRAIL!

Our history has been hi-jacked by New Speakers who know no absolute truth who have redefined, reframed and deceived the generations a small dose of arsenic at a time.

These same people and those who have embrace these distortions as fact propose to deny me my First Amendment rights of the free exercise of religion and free expression of my beliefs. And will no doubt scoff at these words as well. (I am dusting off my soapbox- brace yourselves!)

Back to Pastor's message:
2. When people rule. (Judges 6:17) When each person is left to follow their own individual convictions and conscience as right. Where no basis or standard for absolute truth exists.

ANOTHER.RABBIT.TRAIL.

There must be a standard, absolutes that draw boundaries between right and wrong. Not that we treat our differences in an uncivil manner, but that we would draw light to the absolute standard of God's Word through unconditional love and prayer, not by sowing discord or stirring up raucous rhetorical debate, but by establishing ourselves in grace and the love of God and by being His hands and feet while honoring the institutions that He ordained for orderly living.

And the final point:
3. When Believers keep SILENT. We must make our voices heard!

Ps. Robert shared several verses to illustrate this point, but two stood out to me. (1) The story of four lepers who witnessed God's miraculous deliverance from military oppression, but kept silent... 2 Kings 7:9 records their repentance over the matter, "Then they said to one another, 'We are not doing right. This day is a day of good news, and we remain silent..."

(2) Isaiah 62:6 "I have set watchmen on your walls, O Jerusalem; They shall never hold their peace day or night. You who make mention of the LORD do not keep silent,"

OFF.THE.BEATEN.PATH.Again...

We must be heard. Today the evening news revealed that the #2 candidate in the Republican Iowa Caucuses came unexpectedly from Rick Santorum who said that he has gotten through the daily challenges of campaigning for the top GOP spot in the political races of 2012 by the grace of God. He thanked God and honored his wife's contribution to his success today for the favorable showing in Iowa where he garnered 1/3 of the total votes of those professing to be born-again believers.

He went on to say, "With your help and God's grace we'll go on to another fun fight a week from now."

Which brings me to Ps. Roberts's final statements, "The point is it's time for you to get concerned. It's time for us to get involved. It's time for us to vote. It's time for us to speak up. It's time for us to make our actions heard. It's time for us to pray so our nation can once agin be One Nation Under God indivisible with liberty and justice for all!"

As the service closed we prayed and asked God what He wanted us to do in response to the message. God highlighted the last passage I shared, Isaiah 62:6 and how it ends with a comma... A pause before the statement continues. Hear this as a call to prayer for this nation.

"I have set watchmen on your walls, O [United States of America]; They shall never hold their peace, day or night. You who make mention of the LORD, do not keep silent, And give Him no rest till He establishes And till He makes [the United States of America] a praise in the earth."

My question tonight is will you be a watchmen who does not hold your peace day or night, does not keep silent but gives God no rest until He makes this great nation a praise in the earth as it is in heaven? His will be done!